Anger is a normal, though often less appreciated emotion. Children who experience anger may not know how to express anger in healthy, appropriate ways. Adults are often challenged by children who struggle to manage their anger, because it is tense, upsetting, and can cause some confusion between what may require a compassionate response or consequences for their behavior. Anger, irritability, frustration, and rage are strong and natural emotions originating from nervous system responses. Encouragement to process their anger and to develop healthy coping skills can help children feel more comfortable expressing their anger. When caretakers can help in this way it can also relieve tension and increase positive behavior in the home.
Teaching a child with Anger Management?
Nobody ever likes to feel the feeling of being angry. It can make someone push an aggressive act or can make someone feel uncomfortable, some may spit some harsh little words and worst, can turn into an unexpected physical fight. Some prefer to stay silent and bear it all by themselves because they may not contain their emotions once they utter their first word. Some adults find it hard to express anger in any productive or healthy way. Everybody has their own way of dealing with their anger issues. As grown-ups, we may learn some ways to manage our anger issues as time goes by, however, children, who have all the innocence, are not aware of how to handle their emotions which is why they just express it by throwing tantrums and angry behavior.
Not getting a snack, fighting over a toy with a playmate, not getting a kiss, a hug or enough attention from parents may cause children their anger in an instant. Anger itself isn’t good or bad — the way a child deals with it may be destructive or constructive. Once the child shows angry behavior, parents are tempted to send the kid to a room or scold them on the spot or worse will be yelling at them to stop crying, throwing tantrums or things. But as a loving parent, you may want to teach your child how to deal or develop an ability to cope well with their anger.
These are the two types of anger as described above:
- Destructive Anger
It can be directed primarily to others or against the self, ultimately damaging in both directions. Once the child starts crying nonstop or screaming back to you at the top of her lungs and had the possibility to destroy things around her.
- Constructive Anger
One of the crucial issues for how parents educate their children about the way in which they can experience anger in a constructive fashion and how to use anger in a way that is good for you and is not to hurt the other person.
Listed below are some of the strategies that parents use or teach their young ones on how to deal or cope up with their anger management issues.
Make sure that the area around your child is safe and that no one can be hurt if your child lashes out. Usually, when children are very angry they act in a very aggressive manner that no one can make them calm down. They may jump elsewhere or break things along their way. These out-of-control moments of children are where the parents should step in as gently as possible to help them step away from the situation to calm down. Letting them rest in your arms is the safest place they could ever be even if they continue to cry loudly. The child will calm down once she knows that she has someone she can rely on.
Talk things out once calm down
Once the child calms down already, while she rests at your arms gently ask her what happened and what caused her anger but not to trigger her to cry again. Play with her or make a puppet or her imaginary friend talking to her if she’s comfortable with it. If there is something wrong, let her understand what went wrong and give her lessons to ponder. Children nowadays are too smart to understand everything the parents say. Some children need some alone time to reflect for themselves after their crying time is over. Plus, children can figure things out on their own. Once they’re done pondering on everything that happened, they’ll just smile and play again for the second time around. Then, you’ll know that they’re already fine.
Comfort and affection
Toddlers can be comforted by a parent’s physical presence as they may face frustrating situations. Be there to let them know that they have someone who will catch them if everything didn’t turn out the way they want. Children usually are one of the most impatient creatures who sometimes give the parents a hard time and a headache for some instances. Never underestimate the power of hugs and kisses to make a child feel loved and belonged. Your child needs to understand that it’s okay to feel angry, that it is normal. It’s the magic parents use to their children to shut them up at once.
Be a good example
As grown-ups, we are all aware that what the children see are all right in their eyes so they have the tendency to mimic that behavior, especially when handling anger is the issue. What they see in our behavior when we are under pressure, under frustration or in any circumstance may affect your child’s coping ability. Also, there is a need to be careful with your words if you are angry because it will mark their minds and will immediately learn what you had just spit out. Your child is your reflection. How she deals with her anger may be rooted in how you deal with it. Set up a good example, be the intelligent person you are, especially when in front of the child for she’ll just copy everything she learns from you.
We knew how children are so easily forgiving. After some moments of their grief, they will come to look for you, letting you know that they’re already in a good state. Sometimes it is good that the parents will be the first ones to approach her little one after her rage time to make her feel that she still belongs and still beloved even though rage has come to its way. The connection gap should be immediately prevented to avoid anxiety to children. They should feel that they are still welcome after everything that happens and watch how your children behave the next time it might happen again. She may be able to handle herself and watch her grow emotionally intelligent.
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